Three years ago, my father died. Just to type these words is difficult, I think all who loved him are still struggling with the loss. How have three years passed? If you knew Thomas Doll, then you can appreciate the loss we all suffered three years ago. If you never met the man, then no blog post, no matter how well written could possibly explain what he meant to us.
Being in Iraq, away from loved ones, the comforts of home, security, predictability, I find myself constantly wondering what Dad would have thought about the situation here. I would give anything to sit and talk to him about all that I have experienced here in the 17 total months that I have spent in this country. What would he have thought of my role in the first elections in Iraq in January of 2005. What would his reaction be to hearing that the Dining Facility where I ate every day was attacked by a suicide bomber on December 21, 2004? What of the Turkish truck driver who lay bleeding on an Iraqi road while I tried to call for a medevac helicopter to come and pick him up. I wish I could have told him how I spent what would have been his 52nd birthday at the Combat Support Hospital in Mosul, sitting with one of my squad leaders SSG Mejia who earlier in the day had been blown up by an IED on a road I now travel 3 times a week, and whose eyebrows were singed off and his leg crushed by the HMMWV which came to rest on top of it.
I wonder what Dad would think of the world I now live in. Of the customs and courtesies that are part of my daily life. Of my stories of the Iraqi Army, of the dilapidated house we live in. He would certainly appreciate the way our house is rigged up to work, building codes and American standards be damned. I know he would like the stories about the farmers here, and the broken John Deere combines that are scattered through the country.
Not a day goes by that something doesn't remind me of Dad. He had a way of looking at this world in a way that few can Every new experience, tragedy success and blessing in my life makes me miss him even more.
3 comments:
Wow! I do miss your Dad. I wear my green ribbon every day and think of him.
I feel confident that he would tell you you're doing great things with your life and that you have grown up into a fine young man. I also think that like us he would be sorry your where you are and would pray for your speedy, safe return to your family.
Remember what I told you when I said good bye in May. . . I'll do whatever I can to ease this pain for you and your family.
I love you, your family, and your Dad!
Dear Tim,
Thank you so much for your wonderful blog about your Dad. I miss him very much. He was such a gentle, life-filled wonderful soul.
And you are a continuation of that in this life. Yes you are Tim Doll - a unique individual in and of yourself. But many of Tom's qualities are living in you and you reflect them every day in what you do and say and think.
Thank you again- we pray for you and for Mary etc.
Love,
Mary Elizabeth
It is hard to believe it has been that long. As I have told you before if you or your family need anything, I am here for you bud.
I also think he is proud of you for what you are doing and who you have become. I can't imagine anyone who wouldn't be.
Take care and stay safe.
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